Alphabet Soup: T is for Truths

This segment titled Alphabet Soup: The alphabet according to someone with very little shame and a lot of time on her hands was inspired by blogger Mandy Wallace and the Writers of Kern A to Z challenge. Enjoy!

Hello, readers! It’s finally Friday and time for another post. Usually I’m upbeat and verbally energetic, but I was in a weird place when I was writing this post. It wasn’t anything bad and it didn’t really have to do with anything, I just didn’t feel like being cheerful. I was thinking about truth.

T is for Truths

We all have our own truths, swimming inside us. The ones we hide from ourselves and the ones that are too bright to ignore. These things that are real and solid, that settle at the bottom of our soul and anchor us to the world. They give us shape and movement, but most of all they give us substance. They become part of our essence, changing our scent and hiding in the waves of our hair. They whisper and scream and laugh and cry. And we let them because they’re us and, try as we might, we can’t help being ourselves. Here are some of mine…

1. I hate being reassured. Being reassured makes me feel like someone is trying to blind me with rose colored glasses. Claustrophobic.

2. I love my best friend more than anyone else, exempting my mother and grandmother.

3. I’m always surprised when people say I’m confident. It feels like a lie when I spend so much time feeling small and afraid.

4. Try as I might the future seems like a made up thing. Until it’s there and I wonder how it could be anything but real.

5. I still cry over the death of my first dog. Sometimes I don’t know how much I need to cry, about him and life, until I can’t stop the tears.

Until next time, readers.


Alphabet Soup: F is for Farewell

This segment titled Alphabet Soup: The alphabet according to someone with very little shame and a lot of time on her hands was inspired by blogger Mandy Wallace and the Writers of Kern A to Z challenge. Enjoy!

It’s Friday night, readers and I’m all cozy in bed after a day of doing very little. Yesterday was one of those rare days when I’m called in for work and it was brutal, partly because it’s hard work, but also because my boss was being particularly annoying. Say what you will, but I think I’ve earned a day of doing nothing. *shrugs*

F is for Farewells

People say that the only thing certain in life is death, the fact that everything ends. A few days ago, as I rummaged around the mess that is my room for a notebook, I found a journal with farewell messages from high school. I remember passing the notebook around to people and asking them to write something, anything really. It was an attempt to preserve slivers of a time that had been both good and bad, as high school usually is. I collected messages from close friends, people I sort of knew, teachers I cherished.

Looking back I remembered so many moments, so many promises. Goodbyes that were never meant to last forever. Friendships that changed, because we couldn’t change with them. Which is not to say we haven’t changed, but rather that we changed to different frequencies. Sweet words that were written by people who are irrelevant to me now, as maybe they should have been then. I remembered that high school felt like something that would go on forever, that college felt the same way.

Except things still end. They grass may be greener, but it’s never green enough to make things last forever. And so we still say goodbye. To the people we love. To the people we can no longer accept in our lives. To our old selves, with our old habits, and our old flaws. In the end, metaphorical and not, I think we must mean our farewells.

As I read through the pages of my journal, as I remembered each and every person who took the time to share those few words with me, I couldn’t help but wish them well. And I don’t know that I truly wished them well then, but I do now. Blurred by nostalgia, the past makes better people of everyone who didn’t hurt us quite enough to be permanently deemed bad.

Today, as I write this, I remember all the farewells I’ve said since and the ones I haven’t had the chance to say. The ones that were necessary. The ones that happen every once in a while. The ones that are yet to come as the inevitable happens and things end. But most of all, I think of the small ones. The see you laters, the I’ll be back soon, the you won’t even notice I’m gone. Those are the ones that scare me the most because they’re never meant to be anything other than temporary, until they’re suddenly not.

So, whether we’re at the end of the road or right in the middle of it. Whether you’ve stepped out for a few minutes or you’ll be gone for a few days. Fare well. And come back.

Alphabet Soup: A is for Apocalypse

A few days ago I was browsing Pinterest and I came across Mandy Wallace’s blog. She talks about things like getting back into writing after a long absence (Hello, remind you of anyone?) and offers writing prompts for when you’re well and thoroughly blocked. Like that one kid in school who was always congested, the one that always had to breathe through his mouth. I know you know what I’m talking about.

As I was browsing, and there is A LOT to browse, you guys. It’s fuckin’ awesome. Anyway, I stumbled into an A to Z challenge she did last year with her local writing group, Writers of Kern. I think my favorite entry of hers was L is for Love or a.k.a Why You Want to Eat the One You Love, And Other Curiously Destructive Impulses. My first thought was, “Holy shit this is really accurate!”. The second one was, “ I am totally doing this”. I’m calling it Alphabet Soup: The Alphabet According to Someone With Very Little Shame and Too Much Time on Her Hands.

Without further ado, I give you…

A is for Apocalypse

Some people jones for romantic comedy or a good thriller, I get twitchy thinking about dystopias and post-apocalyptic settings. And I’m not the only one, the end of the world as we know it is everywhere right now, from zombie apocalypses to natural disasters. Nowadays it’s not confined to books, comics or movies, the zombie apocalypse has been manipulated into fitness apps and guides to help you lose weight while training for the apocalypse.

I’m not knocking it guys. I just got Zombies, Run and I’m dying to try it out. Because, played out as it is, I fucking love zombies. Shaun of the Dead, anyone?

We just have to look at The Hunger Games, Divergent, The Maze Runner, and a host of other movies/books to know that post-apocalyptic and dystopic stories are killing it right now.  It makes me wonder where this obsession with apocalypses and dystopias comes from?

I’ve always thought it has to do with a weird satisfaction that comes with the end of the world, you know. A bit like, maybe there’s so much out there that tells us that the world is doomed, that we actually want to see it happen. Watch the world burn, so to speak. However, there are always survivors. There are always people who, against all odds, survive all these crazy situations.

So, do we really want to watch the world burn? Or is this our way of looking for hope in the most unlikeliest of places?

Let me know what you guys think in the comments below. Check out Mandy’s blog for some seriously great advice on writing. And last, but not least, send some book recommendations my way! I’m interested in knowing what you guys are reading, your recommendations can become part of my challenge.

In the meantime, I’m going to run away from zombies in the hopes of surviving the apocalypse or losing a few pounds. I’ll take either one.

See you next week, readers! Have a good weekend!